I'm coming back into the real world again. The numbness from the past week is subsiding. I never thought the past seven days would ever end. Since last Tuesday evening, it's been total chaos and hell, with four unpleasant telephone calls from family and friends, almost simultaneously. So many things have happened and I can't really talk about it all, as I am still trying to disseminate all the information myself. In certain life situations, events are sometimes totally out of our hands and our control. To sit and watch and wait, until something is said or done by someone else is absolutely horrifying - especially to a hyperactive one as myself - and I feel totally hog-tied.
What do I do to ease myself to relinquish these feelings? Nothing and everything. I pray quietly and loudly. I stay busy and I sit quietly. I ask questions and I patiently await answers. I sleep, but I am so tired. I research and I still wonder. I worry and I am hopeful. I love and I hate.
So, onward and upward, as they say. I look forward to dealing with the mundane again. I look forward to wiping the kitchen counter after a leisurely dinner at home or to lay on the sofa with the old dog or to pick up on my daydreaming or reading again. RT and I have been very busy at the office. I've begun to help plan Jess' wedding and our first visit to the site. I'm trying to get on with things, and we are both looking for the old routine again.
It seems no matter what kind of turns life takes, the whole blasted world just keeps turning. No one stopped to ask anything because everyone has their own busy lives, jobs, families and problems of their own. When you think about it, I guess it's kind of comforting to know that we all don't stop for everyone's problems. It would totally paralyze our society. It's bad enough I've been mesmerized by the news with dumb ass Spitzer and the prostitution ring. That's enough waste of time for me with someone else's problems.
I'll go visit the kids downtown this week. The Baby needs some clothes and The Boy is looking to repaint the inside of our other home he'll move into this summer. I'll get him to look at paint chip samples, though he's as color blind as a fruit bat with Raybans ! The Baby will help him choose.
Right now, I would love to have my sharp wit to get a few political bashes in, but I just don't have the mental energy right now.
xoxoxo
divertente
P.S. TO R & J: I'll call you Tuesday or Wednesday. I got your message and it sounds like you've had a hell of a month as well! Got your RSVP too - sounds like we're all gonna need the big ass April Fools Party and we need to get as goofy as sin! : )
No comments:
Post a Comment